Oct 302013

Not only as a caregiver, but throughout my adult life I observed that the days I started well were better days and thus, I developed a number of ways to keep each day going that way, or at least I gave it a try. Sure,  Yoda might have had a point when he told  Luke Skywalker that there is no such thing as “try”, but if you ask me, it sure beats to not even try.

Yoda said that “either you do it or you don’t”. Well, if for one reason or the other stuff happens over which you have little or no control,  you might not have the  saintliness to keep on an even keel, but if your mindset is to stay balanced, there is a good chance that you get that keel straightened out a lot quicker.

I’m mostly a positive person who looks for what’s good about situations. That helps me to keep in a cheerful mood right from the first light of dawn as I wake up to start a new day. Each morning, I tell myself “Ah, another perfect day! I’m ready to start the day and tackle anything that comes my way with ease and grace!”

However, not all my family members share that mindset.  They don’t all have that bright eyed and bushy tailed morning attitude and often impart some negative feelings to me, mostly because they can’t handle that much cheerfulness in the early morning hours.  When this happens, if I’d allow it, my cheerful mood could get beaten down in a hurry. I admit it, it happened often enough, when all my good intentions have indeed fallen by the wayside on mornings when I already woke up with leftover stress or a deep dread of what the day will bring.

Yet, over the years I got better and better in maintaining balance because as I recognize the triggers that can throw me off course, I also learned to not allow these buttons to be pushed or at least not as hard.

The problems of others will never go away.   As a caregiver, your problems also never stop if you allow them to be problems. That’s where attitude comes in. Attitude adjustments are to be made often, but believe me, it gets less and less difficult. Just as bad things seem to built up on top of each other, so do good things multiply. Either way, it is  largely because if we dwell on the bad, that’s what we notice. If we dwell on the good that’s what we notice. Believe it or not, that’s how the world works.

Focus on yourself.  You can’t change the way others act around you.  Do the best you can do, and don’t let others get you down. Starting each day in anticipation of it to go well, more often than not, you can keep it going that way.

May you start each day well and end it well, too.

With love and gratitude.