Oct 262013
 

It is well documented that for every minute that you exercise, you add one minute to your life. This enables you at 85 years old to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing home at $5000 per month.

My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was 60. Now she’s 97 years old and we don’t know where in the world she is.

The only reason I would take up exercising is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.

I joined a health club last year, spent about 400 bucks. Haven’t lost a pound. Apparently you have to show up.

I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what I’m doing.

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.

The advantage of exercising every day is that you die healthier.

If you are going to try cross-country skiing, start with a small country.

I don’t exercise because it makes the ice jump right out of my glass.

I used to watch golf on TV but my doctor told me that I need more exercise; so now I watch tennis.

If exercise work pays off in the future, shouldn’t laziness pay off now?

A daily exercise regime never killed anyone, but why chance it?

Isn’t having good health merely the slowest possible way you can die?

I don’t exercise at all. If God meant us to touch our toes, he would have put them further up on our body.

You could run these over to your friends but why not just e-mail it to them!

(This little gem arrived in my inbox and was attributed to G. Pedersen.  I truly enjoyed this and am sure others who need a little chuckle do too. Unfortunately I was not able to find  G. Pedersen who authored it.  If anyone knows this author, please let me know, so he or she can be fully acknowledged.)